Mercies in Disguise

In Luke 13 Jesus tells a parable about a tree that hasn't produced fruit in years, so the owner tells the gardener to cut it down. But the gardener asks for one more year to see if pruning and fertilizing will help, and the owner agrees.

I am a firm believer in God's mercy and long-suffering, but I also believe that there is a point when He says, "Enough." As a follower of Christ, my only purpose on this earth is to build the kingdom of God. If there is no evidence of that in my life, then why shouldn't God just take me home? I think this passage clearly states that that is exactly what God does with unfruitful Christians. But because of His mercy and patience, He gives us second chances.

There have been times in my life when I felt like God was allowing me to be hurt and overwhelmed by a figurative load of crap. There are many situations that He could have prevented or protected me from. But what if those situations are His pruning and fertilizing in my life to prompt growth? What if I never learn from those hard times and always resist and complain? "What if trials of this life are His mercies in disguise?"

11 steps to prepare for parenthood

(Taken from my friend Shannie on FB)

Lesson 1

 

1. Go to the grocery store.

2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home.

4. Pick up the paper.

5. Read it for the last time.

 

Lesson 2

 

Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.

2. Lack of patience.

3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.

4. Allowing their children to run wild.

5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

 

Lesson 3

 

A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)

2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.

4. Set the alarm for 3AM.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.

6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.

7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.

9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

 

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

 

Lesson 4

 

Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.

2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.

4. Then rub them on the clean walls.

5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.

6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

 

Lesson 5

 

Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.

1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.

 

Time allowed for this - all morning.

 

Lesson 6

 

Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.

1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.

Leave it there.

2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.

3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.

4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

 

Lesson 7

 

Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

 

Lesson 8

 

1. Hollow out a melon.

2. Make a small hole in the side.

3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.

5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.

6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.

 

You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

 

Lesson 9

 

Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

 

Lesson 10

 

Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

 

Lesson 11

 

Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

 

This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say 'it's all worth it!' Share it with your friends, both those who do and don't have kids. I guarantee they'll get a chuckle out of it. Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent!

Life is Like a Puzzle

Have you ever thought about how much life is like a puzzle? I've been thinking about this a lot lately. It's like God handed me a puzzle when I was about ten years old. Of course, it didn't come with the box, so I have no idea what it's supposed to look like. But, in the beginning, it was relatively easy. I found the straight-edge pieces and put those together. That defined who I was as a person.

Then the task got more difficult. I would work on one section at a time, trying to fit the pieces together. Sometimes I would work on several sections at a time. It was exciting when I got on a roll and everything started falling into place. But there are also those frustrating times when nothing seems to fit.

Now I'm almost 35, and I expected to have more of it figured out by now. Sure, there are large sections of the puzzle that are completed, and I can take great pride in that. But there are just some areas that drive me crazy, parts of myself that I can't seem to fit together. It's like all the blue pieces of the ocean ... or the sky... or both! Who knows! After hours of examination, all the pieces begin to blur and look alike. So I take a break. But now it occurs to me that I've been working on those sections off and on for years.

It's like the puzzle is laid out on my dining room table, and I have to walk by it every single day. I am reminded that I have to work on those troublesome sections. Some days I get motivated to tackle it again, only to get frustrated once more. The result is a feeling of stagnation. This puzzle has become more of a burden than an adventure.

What makes it more difficult is when I try to talk about these frustrations with others. The problem is, their puzzle looks different than mine. Maybe the part that is giving me so much trouble, was actually quite easy for them. So their advice is not helpful. In fact, it is sometimes hurtful.

I haven't given up. I still have the determination to finish. And at times like this, I need to remind myself that there is one who knows exactly how the finished product looks. He's the one who designed it. Maybe I've spent too much time staring down at the table and not enough time talking to the creator?

Learning about Joyfulness

Did you ever play this game? Each person lays their head on the belly of another person and then the first one says, "Ha! Ha!" That first laugh is not genuine, but by the time the second or third person says it, everyone is truly laughing. The more they laugh, the more their heads get bounced up and down. It's really contagious.

The kids and I had fun learning about laughter, comedians and clowns. But the real learning began when I made them think about the difference between happiness and joy. I asked them some really hard questions about where true happiness comes from.

To go along with this theme, we read the classic story of "The Secret Garden." It took us about two weeks to get through it (with me reading it outloud). The kids were not in the habit of sitting still and listening to me read a story, since all of them can read for themselves. I was asked several times why we couldn't just rent the movie. But after just a few sittings, I began to requests to read the story during all times of day. It was exciting for me to see my kids become interested in a classic. The story is so touching at times that I would often tear up. Susanna has now begun to tease my about how easily I cry. But she doesn't yet understand how beautiful it is to see a child discover joy and friendship for the first time.

During this study about joy, my mother-in-law had to go into the hospital. It was a terrible ordeal for her, but it fit in perfectly with my lessons as I tried to teach them the Biblical principle of joy in the midst of suffering. One day I had the children draw pictures for her to put up at the hospital and bring a smile to her face. A couple of times the children visited her at the hospital. And then they visited her at home while she was recovering.

They must have talked non-stop for close to an hour, and it was all so random that I had to try to write it down. Here are the notes I took while it was going on (using the first initial only for each child's name):

As we walk in the door, Clarice starts talking about what we want to be when we grow up: C- nurse for animals; A- inventor of the flying car and the underwater city.

J and A -Explaining to Abuela about size of Jupiter, heat output of larger stars;black holes.

Susanna talks about her dreams of another solar system which Andre thinks might be true if God wanted it that way.

Andre talks about diamonds that are man made.

Susanna goes back to talking about her dream of another solar system and the people who live there.

J. Keeps having dreams of wearing a jet pack that shoots him to Jupiter. Abuela asks if he likes Jupiter and he says, "Yes... Well... I like things that are big."

A. Talks about how far a light year is.

C. Is just sitting on Abuela's lap and cuddling.

S. Continues talking about dream world: "Kid digs in the ground with a fork and finds something. He says "ooh! A penny!" but it was really gold."

J. Dream: Jet pack shot him to an asteroid belt. Sort of like a choose- your-own-adventure book. He magnetized the meteors which were mixed with gems and they came back to earth with him. He crash landed into the neighbor's house (but nobody was living there) and he was ok. Happy ending.

A. Thinks J. might have a good idea: "Magnetized belt can keep a person from flying into space
while at a space station."

S. Dream world: "Kids had jobs not adults. Two kids for each family, but lots of parents."

J. "I can use my head to make static electricity. " He rubs his head on the couch and then says, "this is the wrong kind of couch."

Abuela. Asks about the field trip to the food bank.

A. Explains why we couldn't go in (because most of the group had on open-toe shoes which were not allowed in the warehouse. but we'll go again soon.)

S talks about the people who have to make their own houses on her world

J says susanna's world is like the computer game Spore

A starts explaining about the different civilizations in Spore with input from J

C demonstrates how she can almost do a split

A continues explaining

C starts talking about the types of animals she will have when she grows up, like a nurse shark

A "nurse sharks are not really nice"

J. "Sharks don't really like the taste of human blood."

A. Explains about an episode of Mythbusters involving sharks to test what attracts them: movement or smell of blood

C reminds me that we are supposed to go to the pool

A. Mythbusters episode with robot dog in the water with real scent of dog (tv guy explained that the scent was like the dog's business card)

Abuela- "sniff, you're a plumber! Sniff, you're an engineer." (much laughing)

S. sniff: "I'm a dog who destroys your toilets by licking them!" (much more laughing)

C. "My cat will be named flufffy."

J. "I'm going to have eight kittens."

A. Talking about myth that bullet will be stopped by pizza boxes. Then the myth that two semi-trucks would crush a car between them.

C. Is looking at things all around the room then reminds me of the pool again

A. Still recounting the episode of pancaking the car.

C. Is hanging on me or bouncing next to me saying "pool! pool! pool!"

S. "I can feel the vibrations of Andre's voice in the couch cushions."

A. Demonstrates a sonic boom with his arms and comes close to hitting Johnathan in the face.

Laughing

C. Remembers an episode about London Tipton who accidentally hits someone in the face when she says "London Tipton has arrived!!"

A. Talks about sonic waves

Abuela describes ultrasound procedures

C. Is on my back flipping my hair into my face and asking to go

I say it's time to go

A. Keeps trying to finish the story about the pancake car

J and C start wrestling, then move away

S gets her shoes on and says goodbye




C talks about club penguin

A and J keep talking about sonic booms

Hugs and goodbyes

S. Asks about a green plaque on Abuela's shelf

Abuela Explains

S. Asks about rock. Abuela explains it's a quartz from Nicaragua

J. Asks about a shell. Abuela explains it's a scent box imitating a
treasure box from Anthropology

We leave with Andre still talking as we head out the door.



Another benefit of homeschooling: we had the pool to ourselves!

The First Week of School

The curriculum that I chose to use is called Konos. The lessons are based on themes, so that all four children can be learning the same theme but their assignments are tailored for their age-level. They each have their own math and language arts books, but we spend a relatively small amount of time doing workbooks (which is why Johnathan can do his workbook on the floor under some pillows without getting extremely uncomfortable). This curriculum focuses more on activities and discovery learning. If you've ever seen The Magic School Bus, then you know what I'm talking about.

I chose to start the year learning about Cooperation. If there's any way we will survive this school year, it will have to involve cooperation. There are several subjects in the Cooperation Unit, including the human body (ie. all the body systems work together), the 50 states (working together to make one country), and bumblebees (you get the idea). The last subject is about the family, and that is what I started with. We will come back to the other subjects later in the year.

While learning about families, we discussed our own family tree and attempted to make one for our wall. That led to discussions on the different races of our ancestors. I had checked out quite a few books from the library about races and families around the world. They discovered that children around the world have a lot in common.

We read a fascinating book about America's oldest family farm, and how they worked together to keep it running all these years.

As an example of a family that worked together during hard times, we watched the movie "Little Women" and read some exerpts from the book. Normally, this is not a movie that my kids would have been able to sit still for. But I made a rule at the beginning of the week that there will be no TV on school days, so they were starting to go through withdrawal. I think they would have watched anything I put on the TV.

My plan for Wednesday afternoon was to come up with games for the kids to play that would involve cooperation rather than competition. Surprisingly, while I was still finishing my lunch, the kids started to play pretend. At first, they were making a human sandwich.

And then, someone had the idea to make a fort in the living room. My first inclination was to tell them "no" because it would make a big mess. But.... when I realized that they were inventing their own cooperation games and they weren't begging to watch TV, I decided to let them do it. They played kings and queens in a castle for over two hours before they started to get annoyed with each other!! And they got it all cleaned up before Luis got home. :)

Other activities during the week included working together on a story about "The Perfect Family Vacation", learning some spanish words for family members, acting out situations that cause conflict and finding a peaceful solution, and discussing our roles in the Family of God.

So that's it for our first week. Of course I won't be giving a detailed account every week, but I knew some of you were wondering how our first one went. :)

Homeschooling 4kids... Am I crazy?

Of course, I don't think I'm crazy, but others might. Even my own mom's initial response was, "Why in the world would you want to do that?!" But once I explained my reasons, she became very supportive. I expected to hear responses like that from most people, but I really began to question myself when I started getting feedback from my homeschooling friends. They seemed to get exhausted just considering the idea of homeschooling four kids (especially the friends who only have one or two kids). And, yes, I agree it will be a lot of work. But I haven't changed my mind. Here's why:

I've been teaching Andre (my oldest, who is eleven) at home for a couple of years now. My reason for keeping him home was primarily because he did not do well in a traditional classroom and he was quickly becoming a very angry, unhappy child. After a few months of teaching him at home, I saw a dramatic improvement in his emotional well-being.

Since then, I've debated with myself about whether or not to homeschool all four children. I've wondered what was really, truly the best option for them. My biggest motivation for considering homeschool was their character development. Slowly but surely each child is developing character traits that I really don't like. But, honestly, that's only logical. They spend a few hours at home and church each week learning positive traits, while they spend over 40 hrs a week in a school enviroment which models an unknown amount of negative traits. I feel like all of my time is spent correcting behavior which leaves no time for improving behavior.

At the beginning of the summer, I began to do some research and seek guidance. I prayed that God would make it clear to me what was the best choice for our kids. And I really believe that God answered that prayer.

There were two events over the summer that made a big impact on me. The first one was at a "Getting Started" event with my local homeschool group. They call themselves the Unfailing Homeschoolers, and many of my close friends are members. I attended a couple of their events last year with Andre and I was really impressed with the size of the group, the organization, and the committment of its leaders. So I attended the "Getting Started" event, even though I had already been homeschooling for two years, because I was now about to "jump in with both feet", as they say. One of the leaders gave a very encouraging talk which addressed many of the fears that mom's face when they first make this decision.

• What if I don't teach my kids everything they need to know?
• What if I can't be organized enough and we end up in chaos?
• What if I actually do more harm than good?

It was encouraging to know that all moms have these fears, and yet they become successful homeschoolers anyway. But the one phrase that really stuck with me was something like this: If you don't start out with a strong conviction that homeschooling is best for your family, then you won't last long. That's what I needed: a strong conviction. So far, I really didn't have one. I thought that the idea of homeschooling was great for some families. But lots of kids go through the traditional school system and turn out just fine. So I needed to be convinced that homeschooling my children would be a better option than any other before I could finally make this decision.

The second event that impacted me was the H.E.R.I. Convention here in Jacksonville. The keynote speaker was a man named Andrew Pudewa who is the director for the Institute for Excellence in Writing. I really enjoyed hearing him speak. His lecture on "Freedom Education" opened my eyes to different methods of teaching children. He made me question the history and philosophy behind our American school system, referring often to a book called "The Underground History of American Education" by John Taylor Gatto (which can be read for free online). I was reminded that our public school system has not really been around for very long, and that many of the great founders of our country were taught at home. When the lecture was over.... I was convinced.

Since then, I have purchased the curriculum (more about that later), made our daily schedule, bought school supplies, and officially began school on Monday, the 24th.

I'm planning to blog every now and then about our experiences. I expect to have lots of interesting stories. :)

In my next blog, I will go into the details of what I learned in that lecture and in beginning to read that book for myself.

New Look

Everyone loves a makeover now and then! I just found lots of really great free backgrounds at this site. There are so many looks to choose from that I may just have to change my background every month!... Wait... I don't really blog that often do I? Well, maybe I'll start now. Especially since several of my friends have blogs now. Hmmm...what to write?